Well here we are. I'm 36wks and 3days. Following my midwife appointment this morning we were told that he's 'engaged', a whole two/fifths (2/5) which is good and means he's sitting as he should within my pelvis (I'm still not convinced he's going to fit - we have one more antenatal class this evening and I'm determined to see that baby-doll make it through the hole!). He could make an appearance in the next 2 to 3 weeks. By 37wks Little One would be considered full term.
Full term.
And my mind boggles at how fast it's all gone. I'm in awe. The creation of life doesn't take very long in the big scheme of things. Around 248 days in fact to create a little person that will one day become an independent adult who will go on to have a family of his own one day.
There is that age old saying about it taking a village to raise a child and this is true. When we found out I was expecting we very quickly started speaking about who'd take on the role as Godparent/s. I spent a lot of time thinking about this while we were in Italy earlier this year, on a boat going around Capri. When I told Ryan about my idea, he loved it as it meant we didn't have to pick just one person or couple. We could create our own little village.
Faith
One of my oldest and dearest friends has been in my life since I was 15. Richard remained the only person I'd ever met by chance (i.e. not through school, or work, or friends, or family) up until 2007 when 'chance' intervened again and I met the father of my soon-to-be-son. Richard and I have shared twenty years of friendship, the type of friendship where you can just pick-up where you left off and you don't need to explain where you've been for the last few months because it really doesn't matter (unless it was jail, but even then I think I'd be pretty accepting depending on the circumstances). It's the type of friendship that brings out the very best in you. A friendship that has spanned, provinces and then continents, divorce and utter heartbreak. Admittedly I only have a handful of friends that fit this description. And I believe a handful is all I'll ever need. Equally, Ryan is the same and the friends he has, have been in his life for a long time. Together we have two handfuls. One of the constants in Richards life has been his unwavering faith in God and it's been the same since I have known him. I know that we will be friends for another twenty, thirty, forty, or God willing, fifty years from now.
I want our son to be blessed with this sort of friendship and never doubt that all he'll need in life is faith and a handful of friends.
Hope
He's been in my life since 2007 and the first time I met him the family resemblance between Ryan and his cousin Jimmy (James) was uncanny. Both Jimmy and Ryan suffered such personal loss that same year. And not being related to either of them at the time, or knowing their beloved, I merely stood in the background. I watched each go through their journeys of grief. I knew the 'before' and 'after' version of both Ryan and Jimmy and although time does heal - it never mends completely. The hole left in each others hearts has just grown a little smaller and I've slowly seen each return to their 'before' versions. When we found out that Little One was a boy we knew immediately that his middle name would be Haydn, in memory of Ryan's brother, who can never be replaced but will always be remembered. Jimmy epitomizes hope...just like his cousin. It's a wonderful Smethurst family trait as is their sense of humour, both are equally funny and if you didn't know they were cousins you'd automatically assume they were brothers. Both are genuine, fearless, half-cup-full-pick-yourself-up-dust-yourself-off sort of people. Which sums up hope for me.
I want our son to know hope in a world that can sometimes seem completely hopeless and who better to teach him than his 2nd cousin.
Love
One of the constants in my life has been my sister Kerry. When Ryan and I got married two years ago Kerry admitted that I was quite a painful little sister during her speech but that in the end I became quite useful. All little siblings are painful, they turn your life upside down and become your little shadow. As the years have gone by and we've grown older, I'm lucky that my sister has become my best friend. I wouldn't have become the woman I am had it not been for my older sister. We are so different; Kerry is patient, structured, really thoughtful and forgiving. I'm the polar opposite I think. We have never had an argument that has caused a divide between us. We never will. The love you share with family is unconditional. Family can drive you nuts too and hands down our families are crazy...but in a way that makes utter sense to us. My sister was hoping for a little niece, partly because she found a lot of things on Pinterest that would appeal to any little girl. It was Kerry who used to spark my imagination while growing up and I could so see her sharing the same adventures again. And she will. But not with a little niece...not yet anyway.
Love is the most precious element in our lives, without it we're just drifting like boats without sails. Our son is already loved by us but he'll need to be shown by others to give it unconditionally and my big sister will teach him how.
Faith, Hope and Love are all in place. Our village complete. We're ready and waiting Little One (don't be late, that's one trait of ours that we don't want you to inherit!)
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| Richard Faith and Mom on the Thames - July 10 2013 |
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| Jimmy Hope, Dad & Mom, Kerry Love in the backyard, last BBQ of the year July 13 2013 |
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